The Ego

My Ego, Oil on canvas, By Beki

9.9.20

Could it be that we have been making the ego the villain in our ongoing drama of this story of separation with the Soul as the hero? If we would only remember the truth of who we really are, the Soul, then we could dissolve the ego like the bad witch in the Wizard of Oz. I know that we are doing our best with words to understand, contemplate, and make sense of this reality that we are navigating. The many philosophers, intellectuals, scientists, shamans, religious scholars, artists etc. strive to offer their own versions of what all this Life could be about. 

But could it be that all the versions are a story, a metaphor, an analogy to describe the indescribable. Even science, the purveyor of irrefutable provable reality, is in truth an art, a philosophy that keeps evolving and producing the most beautiful new discoveries and inventions. If only we could appreciate the creativity and innovation that emerges from these deep thinkers without needing to make it right to justify its value, perhaps we could make space for the validity of all. 

So I would like to tell a new story about the ego. The Ego feels very unappreciated these days, particularity within the spiritual arena that speaks about burning, dissolving, and letting the ego die. Of course we have used the term loosely as a way to describe people who are ‘full of themselves’, arrogant, and braggadocios as having a particularity big ego. It is the ‘unspiritual’ part of the self and tends to be considered a hinderance for liberation. It is pretty much always used as a derogatory term and therefore has fallen into the role of villain. 

However I would like to consider the idea that the Ego is the human self, the part of our consciousness that we merge with when our Soul enters the physical body. The Ego understands that it must work with the Soul to show It how to navigate the physical dimension of polarity, gravity, and limitation. This is not the domain of the Soul, who is by nature unlimited, eternal, and infinite. Yet, our Souls choose to be limited within these parameters for a very good reason or we would not be here. This physical world is BEAUTIFUL and full of potential and possibility. It allows for the most sensuous and delicious experiences that require the container that these limitations offer. Limitations such as: a mortal, physical body that can feel pain and pleasure and everything else; the inability to walk through walls so that you can touch them and feel the boundary between you and another; otherness, so that you can see, touch, hug, dance, kiss, make love with a separate being. Don’t even let me get started with the intoxication of the physical senses! 

I think we can all agree that there are many assets to embodying a human being. Yet, we can all see the limitations and the heartache that it causes are equal to the ecstasy. It seems as though we have become so identified with the physical human self that we have forgotten our divine nature that knows our magnificence beyond the limitations of this dimension. We had forgotten that this was a choice and that we are more than this identity, body and this life. In this forgetting of this essential essence of our Being, we became overly identified with the Ego aspect of our being and without the conscious partner of the Soul driving the ship, our Egos jumped into the drivers seat to save the day. 

Whose fault was it, when the Soul seemed to disappear, fall asleep or get knocked unconscious? I think it is the nature of the Ego, that lives from separation consciousness, to ask that question and to argue and justify. Without the Soul present to infuse the frequency of Divine Love this story of separation takes over and we begin the slippery slope down this hellish hole of life without the Soul. 

Yet, the great awakening that we have been dreaming of is upon us. It is the awakening to the essence of the Soul, not just in ourself, but in all Life. ALL of it. At the beginning of this awakening we saw the ego as the problem. It seemed that when it took over all hell broke loose across the earth: corruption, famine, genocide, slavery, deforestation, devastating climate change, polluting of the soil, air and water and so on, and so on. Soulless humans running the show! 

Could it be that the human self, the Ego, got a bad rap. I would like to contemplate another story for a moment. The Souls of humanity choose this experiment of stepping back, letting the Egos take a go at it on their own. Maybe our Souls wanted this particular probability played out to know what it is like to be simply human-identified and feel the full amnesia from the Inner Divine perspective, and then to wake back up to this realization of the truth of who we really are; to forget to remember. 

From our human perspective this seems like a horrible idea! The Ego didn’t ask for this solo gig. It could not even be alive without the breath of spirit giving it life, so why would it want to be alone in an already lonely, separate mind? I have weaved this story, not as truth, but as way for myself to begin to perceive the Ego as something that I can appreciate, love and incorporate as a crucial aspect of my being. As I dismantle the old story of separation and polarity, I aim to allow a new story of interconnection and oneness to arise. It is pushing its way through my mind and my words as I contemplate the ego in a new way. 

My ego and my human-embodied soul are co-pilots on a grand adventure. They need each other. They are indeed apart of each other. When the Soul leaves the body the human self succumbs to the limitations of the physical dimension and re-emerges with the earth-body, Gaia, from which it came. The Soul returns to the spacious infinite dimension among the stars. The love affair comes to an end and the ache for this dance remains forever in the heart of the Soul and the body of the earth. 

In a time and a space within the lush garden of earth a precious and beautiful expression of the Infinite Source of Love entered the womb of a woman, native to this land. The womb was a new and foreign world to the Soul that felt the tangible sensation of its mother’s inner body. The slow and gradual awakening of its senses were fascinating to the soul as it merged with the growing body in the belly. The body carried the imprint of the mother and father and the bodies and minds of the humans that came before. The genetic material gave a unique blend of qualities to create a distinct physical expression of all that came before in the bodies that enable this body to emerge in the particular way it did. 

When this new being emerged from the body of the mother, it felt the familiar energy of the other humans that surrounded it for the first time in a way that it could perceive them as separate energies and shapes and colors and sounds. The explosion of senses was mind-blowing.  But the most stunning was the vision of the mother that it had only knew from within, as a part of her. The beauty and strangeness of her being separate from the body it knew as itself was, well, unsettling to say the least. So it slept, a lot, dreaming of the oneness that it knew as most natural. 

Soon the newborn noticed another energy gently prodding it awake. It whispered in its ear. You are a girl, you are a baby, you are brown and soft and smell like roses. You are magic and I am here to show you how to walk among humans. I will show you how to live in a body and keep it safe. I am your soul’s mate. I am Ego, at your service. She flutters her eyes open with excitement and recognition. Oh yes, this is why I have come: to be human and live within the world of form. My Ego is my mate and together we will be able to navigate a life of possibility, wonder, adventure. We are on the leading edge of creation. 

She feels safe with Ego, even though she never knew what feeling unsafe felt like. Earth is native territory for Ego. It knows the ropes and senses into the lineage that vibrate from the human body’s cells newly activated by this unique expression of Divine Energy. Ego knows how to utilize the strengths and weaknesses that it inherited in the body it inhabits. It diligently begins to train the Energy of the Soul on how to use this body and environment to best create and explore the world around it. Ego loves the scent of roses that the Soul brought with her. It is unearthly somehow and full of mystery. It feels sacred and familiar at the same time. Perhaps this body holds the memory of a time when rituals of Love were practiced in the body. The ego feels the memory and opens with a sigh of ease. 

Ego feels at home with the body, as Soul adjusts to the incredibly limiting range of motion. While she is often frustrated by the helpless little body she has merged with, she is full of awe and wonder as she senses the world from the body with sight, sound, touch, taste and scent. It is both bliss and hell all at once, with waves of ecstasy and pangs of intense fear weaving through the the matrix of the human experience. The Soul is fully present with it all, curious and enthralled by this strange and wonderful world. Ego takes her hand and navigates the fearless soul through the complexities of the human body and psyche and the physical dimension it is one with. A great friendship is being forged as this wild ride begins and then somehow, someway, one day something changed, and they lost each other along the way. 

Without the Soul the Ego was lifeless, desperate and callous. Everything was about survival. She was always anxious and worried and felt like she needed to prove her worth so that she would be loved, safe, alive. She needed to keep everyone in her life safe too, so she would be taken care of. Her body felt heavy and cumbersome. The inner flame was dim, for Soul could not be completely gone or Ego would die. There was just enough memory of her glowing warmth to keep going, trudging through life the best she could. 

Without the Ego, the Soul was groundless. She was unable to fulfill her life’s mission to really experience and know the dimension of form and the beauty that comes with this union when embodying the human. She felt restless for felt connection, intimacy expressed, creation manifested. She yearned to know what she came to earth to know and needed her co-pilot to navigate this earthly terrain that felt so strange and beautiful. 

After eons of separation living in worlds that either exalted or worshiped one or the other or disregarded, ignored, disowned or demonized one or the other,  they remembered that they need each other. They bravely stood up and called forth this union, in spite of the naysayers and the tugging and pulling from one side or the other. They decided that no other relationship is more important than this original union when the soul embodied  human. And with one bold and radical act of Love the two merged together as one, and something magically miraculous occurred.  

This reconciliation rippled through the Universe and across planet earth and the new human soul emerged. And on that day a new story was born, and the old one faded away. In this story spirit and matter are one. Everything is imbued with the divine. The Ego is honored as the wonderful earth guide that it is and the Soul is recognized as the revered guest of honor in the world of form. She is the artist in residence that innovates, inspires and ignites, creating beauty and meaning everywhere she goes. She is brilliant and adventurous and fearless and yet deeply respects the advice of her wise and practical guide that teaches her the human qualities that have evolved over millennia, as the body has learned to adapt to the ever changing environment within the earth plane.  Neither ego or soul is considered more important or sacred than the other in this New Earth that was born from the powerful desire demonstrated that fateful day when the Union of Human Ego and Divine Soul was restored.

Oneness, interconnection, unity consciousness flourished across the land and the golden age of Beauty and Bounty began and continues on into eternity. For the memory of the great division and the sorrow and pain it caused is etched in the DNA of each new human body that becomes embodied by Soul. It serves to remind us so we may know our worth with humility and courage as we forge forward and onward on this grand great adventure we call Life. 

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The World and The Inner-Net

Sept. 2020

Do you remember the good ole days, when all we knew about was the small world we lived in. Our immediate world was our world. We had three TV channels with news twice a day for an hour, thirty minutes each for local and world, as I recall. Of course I was a child during this golden age of ignorance, for the most part, which made it even easier to maintain relatively untouched by drama beyond my own. I was born in 1966. There seemed to be as much good news as bad news back then, seen through this limited window of what was happening in our community and the world around us. 

Now of course we are inundated 24/7 with bad news —devastating, heartbreaking, inconceivable, horrifying and terrifying news. Not just is it on television all day and night with hundreds of pundits elucidating us with their barrage of opinions, it is being broadcast in ads and opinions from your own friends and social media community weighing in on our handheld appendage, we call a cell phone. We all know it is hardly just a phone anymore. It is our world. In the palm of our hand. And, everybody else’s world. 

Some of this world is spectacular. It is a window into the brilliance, beauty, creativity, innovation  expressed in the world and humankind. It is mind boggling, the infinite field of information on the internet. Just as when Eve shared the luscious, red, crispy, sweet, juicy apple with Adam, opening their world up beyond the small yet magically perfect garden of Eden, we all eagerly bit the apple of the internet. Our world blew open and we would never be able to go back to the Eden of ignorance. Yes, ignorance, indeed, is bliss.

Yes, we opened up to a world beyond our little worlds and we are all sitting wondering if it has enriched our lives more than it was before, with all this extra information. As we wade through the the catastrophes, calamities, and cacophony as well as the stunning art, flyest fashion, and the latest Tupperware we are being stretched. So much so, we have become numb, medicated, chronically ill, or combustible. Or, perhaps you have found a path to inner alignment. Perhaps you have found yourself, like I, on your path to Awakening. 

I think of Awakening as the realization of your True Self, your Inner Being, your infinite, unlimited, eternal nature. It can be a visceral awareness, a deep ineffable remembering, a flash that feels eternal, or eternity that feels fleeting. It is awakening to the vast infinite field of the inner net that is so deep, wide and vast that it encompasses not just this universe, but ALL universes and beyond. This Divine Self is the inner-net that is truly infinite. When we awaken, we remember this truth and the drama of the form within the in-form-ation that we derive from the internet, is an expression, an outer tendril of this infinitesimal Universe that we are ONE with. 

We have gotten so utterly lost in the form in this information that we have forgotten that we are the IN that is creating the form!  When we go IN we access this creative force that fuels the expressions that unfolds in form. The IN is infinite. It is the non-stuff we are made of! 

We are letting information become more important than those creating it in the first place. Yes, information is created like everything else, save the Source that created it All. 

So what do we do with this contemplation I am sharing now, so it does not become another pile of information absorbed in the internet of things and thoughts. 

I offer it to you to initiate, activate, awaken the part of you that is ready to remember. There is something beyond the landfills of form, lives lived well, and maybe not so well, and all the things that were created on that journey, tangible and intangible, yet form all the same. I invite you to join me as I venture beyond what is and step into the dark cool waters of the unknown that lead us to the sweet sounds of our Souls serenading us into Life and Love that is formless, so that we may infuse our brilliant, creative, distinct essence into a new creation. Let’s leave the known land of massive archives held within the internet and venture into the inner-net that weaves a golden thread of connection with all life living deep within and beyond form. Let’s consider the possibilities we may inspire to emerge from the Infinite Field of formless Love. The womb of creation awaits your entry and lavishly nourishes you as you gestate in her dark fertile soil, so you may bring from your inner-net what you would be proud to see archived on the internet one day. 

The time of ignorance and knowledge has passed and we move into the time of wisdom and remembrance. We have devoured the red fruit of knowledge leaving our innocence behind with our ignorance and now we emerge with experience. With this evolved wisdom garnered through eons of trial and error, we embrace a new innocence, entering the threshold of a new way born of our deepest, sweetest desires. We surrender control and allow the emergence of Love beyond our individual and separate minds, thoughts, beliefs and truths. We trust in something grander, more beautiful, expansive and inclusive to embrace us and guide us to this new garden of Eden that we sense is just over the horizon.

I am here as guide for this inner-net. Although I do not see the way, I have honed my homing device that senses the way, by listening to my inner voice that keeps patiently calling me home. 

Wading into the cool, dark water can be scary at first, but once you begin you may realize that it is the easiest most natural path to take.  While your path may look different from mine, when in the depths of the Divine womb, our paths intersect in this web of intricate perfection and I can feel the vibration of you resonating as you find your way. There are guides, physical and non-physical, for us all, plucking the cords of our strings singing us home to the land where we live in coherence and harmony. 

Resilience

Mind, Body and Soul. Acrylic on canvas. By beki

9.11.20

I live in the land of hurricanes and floods in the lush, green Lowcountry of South Carolina barrier islands. My sister lives on the other side of the country in the land of earthquakes, droughts and wildfires near the majestic hills and dramatic seascapes of California. 

In 1989 one of the strongest hurricanes plowed through my little city on the sea, leaving us with an apocalyptic version of Charleston and its surrounding lands. My husband and I were young and naive and casually bunkered down to ride out the category 5 Hurricane Hugo in our small townhouse in North Charleston. We had a tie-dye business at the time, which we operated in the open-air market downtown. We had all our handmade inventory packed in our car, which we unloaded daily to set up in the market. We did not even bother unloading it for Hugo’s arrival. We had no idea what we were in for as Hugo was raging out at sea with its eye on us!  

The experience was surreal. The pressure in the apartment was so intense that shampoo bottles were imploding, squirting the creamy gel out of closed tops. A tree fell on the roof and sprung a leak in my art studio, water pouring into a light socket in a big closet where I had my paintings stored. Fortunately we had grabbed a garbage can that was blowing around wildly in our front yard earlier as the storm began to ramp up and we were able to collect the water in the empty can. Since we had foolishly not filled the bathtub up with water, as they suggested on the news, that leak was our blessing in disguise. The water we collected served as our only source of water to flush toilets and bathe with for quite some time. While our neighbor’s car parked right next to ours was crushed by another fallen tree, our car was spared and our inventory was miraculously saved. 

While the devastation of property was disturbingly extensive, the demolition of nature was mind blowing and heart breaking. As we surveyed the damage for days to come, we were struck by how fortunate we were to be relatively unscathed, and yet horrified by what this storm had done to this beautiful part of the world we had come to love. I was devastated by the loss of trees more than anything. It looked like a war zone. We were without running water or electricity for at least a month I believe it was, perhaps more. After a couple weeks of primitive living, we packed up and drove to visit family up North. 

While in Canada we heard the harrowing news that there was a massive earthquake in the Bay Area of California, which is where my sister Sarah lived! Two natural disasters in the family within weeks of each other on the opposites sides of the country. How ironic. While it was traumatic and the destruction in the Bay was massive, Sarah was safe and so were her people. 

Our family was shook. 

In the last few years there has been a considerable increase in ‘natural’ disasters and we have braced for hurricanes every season without a break for the past four years. It is hurricane season right now, and so far we have not had a scare for my town yet, but it has been a very active season. We still have about a month or so and I am praying we will get a break. However, as I write, my sister and her world are experiencing wildfires that are raging all along west coast of the U.S. which is profoundly effecting the air quality in the Bay Area where she and her wife live. They cannot go outside to breathe the air. This is happening all in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic, a disease that impacts the airways and the ability to breathe.

Wildfires have been a problem across the globe, threatening life, land, livelihoods, and most poignantly, the air we breathe. Could it be poetic justice. As humanity has clumsily, thoughtlessly, greedily, and recklessly plundered, pillaged and poisoned the earth, the air and the water, we are really feeling the consequences of our actions. Some still deny our part in tipping the balance of a complex and brilliant ecosystem that has sustained life for eons, yet most of us, dare I say, are waking up to the errors of our ways. One may wonder if Mama Earth might decide to shake us off like little pests before we do too much more damage. The truth is it will not take long for the ecosystem to recalibrate after removing us from the equation. The extinction of humanity would be a boon to the planet and the life forms that are in resonance with the natural flow of this planet. We had a glimpse of this during the global shutdown of the majority of human activity initiated as an attempt to slow the spread of the Coronavirus. Pollution dropped extensively, air clearing in areas that smog was so normal that wearing masks was commonplace. Within just days waters cleared. One of my favorite demonstrations of the effects of halting human activity was when over 100,000 flamingos descended on the big city of Mumbai, India during their annual migration! 

So there are two main things I want to address in this writing: the resilience of nature and the resilience of humanity. After Hurricane Hugo demolished my beloved city and countryside I lamented as to whether I wanted to move. For what I loved most about Charleston, that feed my Soul deeply, was the land. My heart broke for the broken trees and I had no idea how long it would take to resurrect its innate beauty from the death I saw everywhere in the barren land. Miraculously nature mended itself gradually and steadily. While we lost a lot, there were still many members of the tree family left standing including ancient oaks who have lived through more than we can begin to imagine. 

As nature mended itself and the lushness of the Lowcountry returned, the human communities banned together to support each other to rebuild homes and businesses. After tears, grief and gratitude, we rebuilt our world around us. Life is resilient! All of life. And we are a part of Life. We belong here and when we are at our best we love Life and we are generous stewards of it. When we are at our best we create beauty and honor beauty. When we are at our best we give freely and we love fully. When we are our best we add value, beauty and life to this precious world and earth we live in. 

As we mature from what seems like a brutal phase of teenage recklessness and our collective frontal lobe finally develops enough to be able to distinguish right from wrong with the wisdom of natural consequences as a guide, our parents will be able to breathe a sigh of relief. The Divine parents of Life know better than to interfere with the powerful learning process that comes from natural consequences. For unlike us human parents who try to control and protect rather than allow for the natural consequences to unfold, Divine Love knows the power of our resilience. It knows there is no loss in the grand scheme of things. Love knows we must learn from our mistakes, and that this is the way we evolve and expand. Our Divine Parents Love unconditionally. This Love transforms, creates and heals. 

No matter how surly and unlikeable our teenager gets, somehow some way, even in our conditionally-loving humanness we love them just the same. Fiercely. Could we expect any less from the Infinite Source of Love from which we all came? Could we consider that no matter how bad our behavior has been at times, no mater how unforgivable we may feel our actions, that we are still welcome in this place we call home. Mama Earth, Divine Love, Source, Allah, Yahweh, Vishnu, Mother/Father God love us all the same, in spite of our wayward ways. 

The real challenge we face is whether we can love ourselves and each other. This daunting task of changing our behaviors must begin with self love. The truth is that the homicidal tendencies seemingly rampant in human behavior is really a disguise for our suicidal wish. For how else could we continue on doing what we do to the earth making it more and more likely to be uninhabitable for human life if we did not have a subconscious death wish.

In 8th grade I wrote a speech on suicide and the only line I remember is the opening sentence. “Suicide is a call for help.” Is humanity calling out for help? In the midst of this chaos of emotion  reflected in the world around us, is it possible for us to forgive ourselves, and truly love ourselves and do the same for others? It is our only hope. If we continue this erroneous path of self-loathing expressed in all forms of violence, abuse, and recklessness, we may inadvertently, and perhaps even innocently commit mass suicide. For when we remember the truth of our interconnectedness, a genocide is suicide. Literally. When we kill another we indeed are killing a part of ourselves, on all levels: biologically, energetically, morally, spiritually.

So if you won’t forgive and love yourself for you, do it for me, for your beloveds and the ones to come. For all of humanity, for the sake of us all, please find it in your heart to love yourself. We do not have time to waste, wallowing in our self-critical nihilism. We have much too much loving and living and healing and creating and growing to do. For when the collective of humanity chooses to live, LIVE we shall! As we develop self love then not only will we demonstrate this love to ourselves but it will be natural to do the same with others and the planet. The outer word will become the reflection of the inner world vibrating with Love. We will allow ourselves to be nourished again by the Mother Earth and receive the natural bounty of her gifts with reverence and gratitude. We have learned from our mistakes and understand so much that we did not understand before. 

The lush, green land of South Carolina restored itself after ravaged by Hugo, cities crumbled by earthquakes have been rebuilt, rain falls on once cracked earth, soil regenerates when left untouched, families resurrect after centuries of slavery, a woman finds her voice after decades of abuse. We are fucking resilient! We can do this y’all. We can love each other. We can love ourselves. We can love and honor this beautiful blue planet we live on. We belong here. We belong here. We belong. 

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My Theory of Emergence

The Vortex. Oil on canvas. By beki

8.25.2020

I propose, from my own spiritual, creative, artistic point of view, my own theory of emergence. I have been contemplating this as I explore the germ theory versus terrain theory as we are in the throes of a global health crisis, the COVID-19 Pandemic, that hinges its existence and perpetuation on the stronghold of this idea of germ theory. It presumes that a germ, a pathogen, a virus, that lives outside us, can jump on us, projected from another person infected with this disease, and cause disease within us. 

This model of reality is entrenched not just in our story of biology, but our social structures and traditional western religious models that assume that we are victim to something outside of us that determines our fate. In my own journey of awakening, I have come to a deep knowing that the Source, we call God, is not a force outside of me, but a Divine essence that resides within me and within all of Life. This Essence is Love and permeates and animates all of life. I also have a felt knowing that we are all sovereign beings of divine proportion, creators with profound and unlimited power that we have become utterly and tragically unaware of. So much so, that we succumb to the belief that we can be crushed and obliterated by an inert virus that succumbs to 20 seconds of hand washing. We believe that if we can just keep it out of our bodies, we will be safe.

In spite of this truth that the Universe resides within us all with divine intelligence and benevolence, the story of separation that fuels the beliefs that we are alone, weak, vulnerable, sinners, and so on, has infiltrated our minds and highjacked our reality. These self-deprecating legacies, entrenched in the lore of humanity, have inspired a perception of reality that tells the terrifying stories of contagion that gave me nightmares my whole life. 

Now I sit in the midst of this nightmare, and I am forced to wake up or else I will drown in my own fear. 

My theory of emergence, reflected beautifully within the ‘New Biology’ that I have recently become very intrigued with, is that everything emerges from you: your body, your mind, your consciousness. As I was doing my morning mediation I thought about how love is something that we seek outside of ourselves all the time. We ache to be loved. But could it be that we ache to feel love or loved. Certainly outside conditions can inspire the environment for the feeling to arise within us, but love cannot be injected into us. Someone can be effusively loving us and unless we can feel it within us, the gesture of devotion can have no effect. Therefore it seems to me that Love lives within and when felt it emerges impacting all who are present to experience the emergence and expression of what was there all along. 

The terrain theory in biology postulates that it is the inner environment of the body that is most consequential when it comes to the ability for conditions of disease to manifest within the body. In a way the disease emerges from the body as a way to alert the person that there is imbalance within. I feel that this imbalance begins with the mind, the thoughts and beliefs, and slowly makes its way into the physical body as a form of inner communication. In this sense disease is not so much a negative event, but rather a  network of communication designed to wake us up to something either spiritually, psychologically, or environmentally that is out of balance. Disease is a mechanism to inspire awareness for rebalancing, homeostasis.  

I also believe that there are conditions expresses in one’s life and body that are inspired by a more mysterious source that allows the soul to experience the adventure it came forth to live. In this case, while the disease could be a way of indicating imbalance, it also could be called forth by the soul of the human for a profound and deeply desired experience that our human minds cannot make sense of. Some things we just simply cannot understand from the human perspective and certainly not from the logical mind divorced from the mystical heart of intuitive knowing. 

Yet, this terrain theory of what I would like to call emergence, feels kinder to me than the older theory of the germ. It offers an empowering story in which we are never victims of life. Rather, we are continuously being offered feedback from the universe of what we are holding within our mind and body that no longer serves us. Just like the belief system that embraces the law of attraction, and that we ‘create our own reality’, I recognize that both by intention and by default, I am participating in my life’s expressions. I choose consciously or unconsciously by my focus and my perception. 

When life feels completely out of my control, I have learned to surrender to my Higher Power that not only lives within all living beings, but lives within me. This act of surrender, in a way, is a declaration of my faith in my Divine Self and the Infinite Source that I am one with. This faith is emergent. It is not something that can be learned. It can be cultivated, but the seed of faith lives within each of us. 

I have come to understand the collective reality, not as something imposed on me, but as an opportunity to see how I am either in coherence or dissonance with that reality. I can then choose consciously how I will participate in the emergence of a desired expression of collective reality. As a Divine Being, I recognize that my expressed energy has an impact on the whole. 

What we embody we emanate. 

When I am intentional and conscious of what I am embodying, I am choosing to be a vector of Love, peace, wisdom, kindness, respect, reverence, patience, understanding. It is my desire to embody that which I yearn to experience reflected back to me from the world. This quality of being that naturally and effortlessly emerges from me, is always what is being reflected back to me. The feedback gives me clarity as to what I am embodying. 

When I am looking outside myself and striving to change the conditions/symptoms, that are really the feedback offered for self awareness and self-reflection, I will often feel the mounting fear and exasperation, victimhood and hopelessness that is the very thing aching within me and causing me to flail in the world of form to create change. 

While some things will seemingly be accomplished from this old way of creating change, the more effective approach to bringing balance and homeostasis to a diseased, chaotic world, is from the inside out. Heal the dis-ease within and embody the essence of what you desire to see reflected in your world and you will become a powerful force for change. The work to heal anything, indeed, comes from within each of us. It is profound, conscious work and often considered self-indulgent. Yet, as we enter into a broader and deeper understanding of life, where the spiritual, social, biological intersect, where all is interconnected, you will recognize the beauty of self-full consciousness as a potent elixir for collective transformation. 

So dear citizens of planet earth, consider this possibility. If you are in the throes of the coronavirus experience or any other threatening reality, take the time to go within and explore what in you is a reflection of the world outside of you. Each of us are experiencing this global condition in different ways. Each of us are triggered by different aspects of this drama. As you see your part in this collective expression, consider what you would like to change about your offering. What is it that you need to embody in you, that you would like to see expressed in the world you live in. As you become clear, you are able to stop projecting all that you fear or despise outside of you and allow yourself to feel how it lives inside of you. 

This courageous act of self awareness is a profound gift to yourself and the whole of Life. As you own this dis-ease, you heal it. For as long as it is outside of you, you will be helpless to heal it. You can only heal what is yours to heal. This self-love heals you. As you heal, you become an unhindered vector of Love that has more influence and impact on the world than any diseased part of yourself ever had. Your inner terrain becomes a field of Love and light and all that comes into your sphere ‘catch’ the virus of love and this is the energy that becomes  contagious. Love will spread like wild fire to all the expressions of life around you and then the rippling effect will be exponential. 

You will be a vision of glowing health that will light up the world with your inner flame so others become more awake and aware of their own Inner Light. So take the time to tend you your inner terrain. It matters. For it is the very space from which all matter emerges. 

Making the Dream the Reality

Unity oil on canvas by beki

7/30/2020

We are in the midst of very strange times. I must admit that I have struggled to stay centered in the whirling winds of this hurricane. It seems that we are all being instigated to feel the buried patterns that keep us steeped in a state of separation consciousness. I would like to consider a possibility, as we collectively dance in the waters of this global crisis. 

Could it be that we are in the midst of birthing a new earth? The metaphysical and spiritual community which I resonate with, offers this potential. I would like to wade in the waters of this possibility and allow myself to feel the warm embrace of the cosmic Mother wrap me in her dark and safe womb. 

Could it be that all the extreme expressions of the illusive belief that we are separate from each other, the earth and all of life, is the last crescendo of resistance before the fall of the old paradigm? Could it be that this intensification of polarity consciousness is the rock bottom we all have been waiting for that will initiate the conversion experience that will awaken humanity to a new way of being that embraces interconnection, interdependence, unity consciousness and oneness? Could it be that this long moment in time is pushing all the dysfunctional programs to the surface to be revealed, so that we can make a choice to delete them from our hard drive, allowing space for new programs that serve the sustainability of Life flourishing on earth, including humanity?

Could it be that our collective Soul chose this moment so that we could evolve?

It feels like we are no longer in the warm embracing womb of the Mother. It feels like we are in the throes of labor. It hurts! To so many of us, it feels as though we are dying because the crushing squeeze of each contraction is annihilating the world we know. Some of us are  unconscious and perhaps numbed by medication that keeps us unaware of the intensity of the moment. For some souls, they have chosen to leave the physical dimension so they can assist from the realms of Divine Love, unencumbered by the fear-based ego. Perhaps some have left their bodies because they knew that their sacrifice would serve a greater good to awaken humanity to the insanity born of separation consciousness. Others are riding the rollercoaster ride with zest and zeal, fearlessly diving into the adventure of this drama. This program of control, competition and division is being revealed and the deep desire for a world of unity, cooperation, creativity and collaboration is growing. 

With the new enlivened desire for this new earth to emerge, we become at times, mesmerized by the conditions that are fueling the fierce desire for this expression of Love to take hold. The challenge for those of us who believe in this possibility is that we stay focused ON the new possibility and do not give our precious energy to the dying program that is fighting for its life. Fighting is the nature of the old paradigm. War is its language. It will fight to the bitter end. So it will require intense focus and commitment to remove our focus from this war zone, so that we can envision peace, beauty, thriving life and creative self expression for all. 

Do you remember the movie “A Beautiful Life” where the father creates a world of wonder and adventure for his son in the midst of being contained  within a WW2 concentration camp? For the love of his son, he ‘fooled’ him to believe this was a game, and he was able to keep him alive until the end of the war so that he could reunite with his mother. It takes a very creative, resilient and unique human being to be so focused. His love for his son and wife was so fierce that it gave birth to this intense commitment to creating beauty in the midst of war. He made the dream the reality for his child. 

It is time for us to do the same. We must make our wildest most beautiful, magical dream the reality in our own personal world. We must take our attention away form the world of war that our past has created, and focus on the world of beauty and peace that our past has inspired!

As we do this in the small ways that are close to home, we will grow in our ability to bring this frequency of a new reality to the larger community around us and beyond. We must practice this fierce Love. Let’s think of those that we love easily and fiercely and embody this New Earth for them. Live it and show them the truth of this beautiful new world. It won’t be hard once we train ourselves to see beauty everywhere. It is all around us already. We don’t even have to imagine, although that is always fun to do. Beauty and Love is the essence of all of Life. It is available in each moment, when we allow ourselves to see it. You may have to take out your metaphysical binoculars so that you can truly see the beauty where normally you see pain. Start with the places it is easy and then challenge yourself to find beauty everywhere. 

I assure you that as I write this, that I am writing this for myself. For someone who is addicted to feeling responsibility for the wellbeing of everyone, this is a challenge that I have failed at miserably. But my persistent Inner Being, and the beings of light and love that are always by my side, keep picking me up and patiently nudge me to this sacred seva —the sacred service that does not leave myself out. For as I embody Love, Beauty, Peace, Joy and Freedom, in the midst of a perceived world of the opposite, not only do I emanate this life giving, transforming frequency to the collective world, I am drenched in these divine frequencies and feel the relief of coming home to the Ultimate Truth of God. 

So I see Beauty. I see it. I feel it. I know it even when I can’t see it. It is in the starving child, the raging racist, the dying tree, in the sick and the poor, in violence and peace, in death, in struggle, in pain, in heartache, in the victim and the villain. Yes, this is hard. This is hard to accept, let alone see. We are trained to judge everything as right or wrong, good or bad, beautiful or ugly, worthy or unworthy. We have been trained to see everything as separate within the consciousness of duality and polarity. It is time to experience a new consciousness that can create a new reality. Our old consciousness keeps creating more of the same old reality. 

I don’t know about you, but I am tired of this limited perception of reality and I am down right exhausted by this war that lives inside and outside of me. It is usurping my creativity and zaps all my energy. So I invite you to find your own way to end the war, and to support me and others to envision, create, and see The more Beautiful World our Hearts Know is Possible that is already vibrating with vibrancy right behind the veil of our own limited perception. Let’s lift that veil and live from this reality, so that we can reveal this living truth for all to see!

Calling all Sacred Activists

SOUL TALK

OM HEALER (Self soul portrait) oil on canvas

6/13/2020

The last three months have been a crescendo of grief, fear, inner turmoil, confusion with many delicious dips into the cool pool of remembering, an urging from my soul to remember my inner truth, and tickles of excitement. Something BIG is happening inside of me and outside of me. I am living through an inner/outer contraction of mammoth magnitude! The global pandemic  initiated the contraction.

I remember when I went into labor with each of my sons, and how the powerful force of creative mayhem would enter my body — the contractions ensuing that would give birth to my beloved child, from formless to form, my long awaited progeny. A contraction is painful, intense and downright terrifying. It carries with it the realization that there is no going back. This baby is going to be born and in the act of its emergence, will ravish my body, ripping me open both physically and emotionally. 

When the labor of birth began my body would shake uncontrollably. There is nothing controllable about birth. It is the wild force of nature propelled by the creative Source of all Life. The best that any of us can do in the wake of Birth, is to surrender, allow and breathe. No matter how much you prepare, when the moment comes to bring life into the world, you are ushered into the deep, dark mystery of the Unknown. 

There is no other metaphor that holds the power and essence of what I am wanting to convey right now. For as I feel it, see it, know it, we are in a massive collective contraction. We are steeped in the chaotic power of a creative force that is squeezing us, calling us in, calling us out, ripping us open. It is indeed terrifying and extremely exciting. My little beki, my human mind is freaking out! But my Soul is fucking stoked. My Soul is feeling the fullness and fierceness of the moment. My Soul does not know the fear that my human self carries. She is not fearless, brave or courageous. She is fucking fierce and dared to come back to this wild world of chaos within this small brown body, in a time when folks are waking up to the atrocities that systemic racism has wreaked on black and brown bodies for centuries. My Soul knows something that I am just coming to integrate. She knows that I am Safe. 

Breathe.

Just take that in. 

You are safe too. We are all safe. 

Yes in the midst of a global pandemic, and now in the middle of the revolution for evolution spurred by the demonstrations protesting the murder of George Floyd by a police officer. Like wild fire, the demonstrations have spread throughout the country and across the world. We are demanding that Black Lives Matter. It is an eruption of all emotions all at once: horror, disgust, anger, rage, despair, terror, hopelessness, possibility, connection, isolation, intolerance, excitement, love, passion and purpose, exhaustion and on and on. I have felt many of those emotions. 

Fear and despair tend to be where I go first when I am emotionally triggered — with both the pandemic and the Revolution. I entered into both contractions with an intensity characteristic of my personality, and as I processed the information that was coming from out there I inevitably would find myself redirecting my energy in here — inside. 

Through my own spiritual journey and evolution I have come to understand how important it is for me to tune in to my Soul’s voice, and connect to the Divine Source of ALL life so that I may experience life with clarity and know my place and purpose within the world. For the last two weeks as I delved into the feeling initiated by my focus on the tremendously powerful movement for Black Lives, I ventured out into the world of matter. I felt the fullness of the external world and all the many reactions to it in my energy body and physical body. That is what I do. Perhaps you do too. It is a curse and a blessing. They call people like me empaths. It is exhausting and heart-breaking.

Yet there is a profound alchemy that happens when one learns to work with these energies. This is something I am definitely feeling happen in me right now. Each day I enter into a dialogue with my own Inner Guidance and I am offered tools and insight to navigate the outer and inner terrain that will be most beneficial for my evolution and support my unique offering to the collective. 

I call this work, sacred activism. When I enter the sacred work of communion with the Divine, I alchemize the human dimension of emotion, thought, belief into an elixir of Beauty. What is born from this inner journey of deep connection with the Love that is the very essence of Life, is an expression that arises from the formless. It is unique, alive, personal and universal. It is grounded in the frequency of Love and it feels clear, powerful, joyful and unconditional. 

When I emerge from this inner realm I am born again, awakened and enlightened. I become full of Presence and feel tuned in to the present moment. 

This is the energy that I am able to bring to the world of form, when I have taken the time to go within. 

For the past two days I have been painting a soul portrait, which requires me to enter into the formless, unseen, infinite field of the Divine. In this process, I open, trust, allow and surrender so that the impulse of this Soul can move through me to create a painting that becomes a tool for my client to re-member and awaken to her Divine Self. 

This is how I create. I create form from the formless. I do not focus on what is, and use that as the inspiration for my art. I enter into the dark womb of creation and let it emerge through me into form, as color, shape, energy, vibration made visible. Just as I did not make my sons, but allowed the seed of life to be planted in my womb, to grow and be born through my very body, so that the Soul of my child could be embodied. This was not a conscious choice, but a sacred agreement between my own soul and theirs. 

Now, I sit in the midst of a world that is seemly falling apart, at a tipping point, on the brink of extinction or the brink of ascension, depending on how you see it. Entropy or expansion.  Terrifying to the mind, exhilarating to the Soul. How do I proceed? How do you proceed? 

My Soul is clear. She tells me that I must create from the void. She tells me this is MY way. I am nudged to sit in stillness, tune in until I feel the fullness of Life and Love enter my being, and then steep in it a while longer. My Soul urges me to move beyond the emotions, after giving space for them to be felt and then to feel what is in that space beyond. I may not be able to see it, but I can feel it. She tells me to go where I go when I create art, when I give form to the formless beauty of Soul, Spirit, Love. She reminds me that this is not separate from the world of form, or the human experience, but it is the very Source from which it all came. It is the Mother’s womb of humanity. Spirit and Matter are one. But spirit is the source of creation, while matter is the creation. If you want to create something new, you must stop focusing on what is already manifested! Let the manifested only be the source of inspiration to ignite the new work of art. 

You see we are all mesmerized with what is already manifested in form, in matter, in the world. We are driven by the manifestation and strive to change it from the dimension of form. We are matching our inner vibration with the vibration of what is already created, when now, more than ever, we must generate a new vibration that becomes the force that creates a new creation, a new reality! That new vibration must be cultivated within each of us first and then we can band together energetically with other creators who are doing this inner sacred activism to affect change from the inside-out. 

Some of us will envision a new earth, a new expression of humanity and the way in which we interact with each other and all of life. Some of us, like myself, will feeeeeeel into a new frequency of Love, harmony, joy, freedom, clarity, empowerment, and embody that energy. 

Some will go within and be inspired to create some form of art that reflects the frequency of the new expression of Beauty we desire to see and feel in the world. 

Do not underestimate the power of this inner work. Do not mistake this removal of attention from the conditions of what is to the Infinite field, as ‘burying your head in the sand’. While this is certainly a coping mechanism for many humans living right now, it is not what the sacred activists are doing when they leave the outer world and enter into the fertile ground of the formless dimension. 

It is profoundly creative work, and requires intense focus and commitment. Yet, it is infinitely more kind to myself, as an empath, to follow the current of my own Soul, and leave the abrasiveness of the manifested world, so that I can feel and create the Beauty that heals.

It is easier to go downstream and infinitely more productive and beneficial to myself and my community, when I allow myself to do what I know I am meant to do in this moment in time. 

I share my own process with you today, even as I continue through the twists and turns, the contractions and expansions, the despair, fear, joy and clarity, to offer you this: 

Follow your inner knowing. 

Know your medicine, your gift, your way that is most natural, true and real to you. 

Bare your Beauty! 

Allow yourself to be yourSelf in all this craziness.

Do not let anyone else tell you how to be in the world right now. Only You know!

It is okay to find Peace inside before working towards peace outside. When you feel safe, you have access to joy, and then you walk out in the world and become a vector of joy and love. So do whatever it takes to remember and realize that you are safe. For me, this is core and the frontline of my inner work. 

Some of my tools for alignment: 

The vibrational medicine of flower essences 

fasting from social media and the news

Writing and receiving guidance for the Akashic Records

Walking in nature

Love making

Reading and watching inspirational material

Grounding/earthing

Follow your inner guidance and if you don’t have a relationship with this Inner Source of knowing, love and wisdom, find a way to develop it. Plan to meet up with her/him/You every single day and I promise you, you will fall in Love! For this is who you are, my dear beloveds. 

You. Are. Love. 

And I love you.

So if you choose, 

BE the vibration of Love and it will be reflected back to you in the world you inhabit. 

Stop being afraid, angry, hurt, intolerant… 

Be LOVE and this is what will BE. 

In Reverence, Love, and Oneness

TRUTH

4/2/2020

This is a message I received from my Divine Guidance:

Any belief that is perceived from within the physical dimension and human mind is relative truth. It is a truth that takes you on the path to the Divine Truth, or Ultimate Truth, that cannot be described in human language, but can be sensed, felt and known in a visceral and ineffable way. 

Right now there is a plethora of truths flying around, in regards to the COVID-19 Pandemic. There is always a myriad of truths circulating humanity, but right now is a particularly polarized time because of the centralized focus by the majority of humanity on the same subject. Everyone is being affected by this pandemic and therefore our attention is, in a sense, singular. However, our individual experience, approach and beliefs regarding this collective condition is far from singular. So, the truths experienced are relative to the perceiver. 

As we navigate these times we are becoming more aware of our Oneness and at the very same time triggered by our differences. Our Oneness is enhanced and felt in a very tangible way when we recognize how we are all in this together and how essential each part of the whole is to the whole being whole. Simultaneously, the differences in the beliefs we hold true are highlighted because we are all reacting and processing the same crisis/condition in our own unique way.

All that being said, it is crucial at this time for each of us to stand in our own truth with confidence and clarity, unapologetically. At the same time it is equally important that we honor and respect the truths that others hold, even if it is not in alignment with what we know as true for ourself. This can be challenging at times, especially when you believe that the other’s truth will be a threat to you in some way. 

For example, you may believe the information that encourages the public to use masks to hinder the spread of the disease. Whereas a family member that you live with may believe that this is ridiculous and totes his own experts that offer conflicting evidence disputing that there is any value in this approach. This can cause a war right in your home. So, while it is challenging, the Divine wants us to know that the opportunity here is for both to stand tall and clear in their truth while simultaneously honoring the other who believes something different.

Truth is not dependent on it being true for all for it to be true at all.

Each being has a unique path that will lead you to the Unified Truth of Love. By honoring our sovereignty and that of another, we can utilize our own personal road map that offers the guidance to live the life our Souls came to live. When we feel pulled and prodded to believe in something that does not resonate with our own Soul, we get lost in the fray and find ourselves wandering in foreign land. The Soul’s path is familiar ground that always feels like home. 

So celebrate your truth and by all means celebrate another when they speak and live their own truth. This is something to truly celebrate! For when another finds the home of their Soul, they are at home in themselves and they embody the Beauty of their Being in a way that benefits us all. When each of us is truly aligned with our Soul, we feel loved, lovable, worthy, beautiful, connected, tuned in. We live from this place of Love embodied, and emanate joy, peace, creativity, wisdom, and a reverence for all life. We are no longer in competition with each other, but are inspired to collaborate with one another to experience and share the beauty we recognize in the self and the other.  

So right now I keep hearing my Divine Guidance nudging me to look at this idea of relative and ultimate truth and how important it is to really own our individual truth. Live from it. Walk your talk. As you do this you will truly feel and know your power. As long as you stay in a place of reverence for the truth of others and the path it takes them on, you will be able to create and experience the world you desire to live in. 

I hope I have been able to express clearly here what I am coming to understand. It feels incredibly profound to me. For so long I think I felt like I needed those I love to understand me, agree with me, join me in my story and experience of life. Somehow I am coming to understand that this is not necessary and in fact the expectation for this becomes a form of bondage. This new way of perceiving things feels incredibly exciting and liberating. It also feels empowering. It really gives me permission to trust my own Inner Authority, without needing someone else to validate it to make it true! As long as we respect others as having their own authority as well and even supporting them in aligning with that, we will see a proliferation of beings who feel worthy, seen, honored and therefore we inspire the best in them to be revealed for us all to behold. ~beki

The Body of Humanity

Every day I check in with Divine Guidance and receive messages that enlighten and soothe and offer clarity and sometimes instructions. This was the first piece I wrote about the Corona Virus on 2/29/20. For some reason I did not post it before some of the writings that followed. I am compelled to share it now.

Beki:

There is a worldwide panic about the spread of the Coronavirus that originated in China and has been the cause of many deaths. Thousands. Please talk to us about disease. Contagious diseases. How do we deal with this issue individually and collectively?

Divine Guidance: 

The Coronavirus is a symptom of sickness within the body of humanity. It reminds you that you are deeply connected to each other, and that if one aspect of your community is suffering then it will effect the wellbeing of the whole. If your foot is broken, you, as the consciousness of the whole, will feel this pain and will want to address it so that it can heal. 

A virus like this speaks to the consciousness of the whole. You cannot simply quarantine the virus in one part of the body of humanity and expect it not to effect the rest of the body. You certainly can attempt to and it will ward off the danger for a while, but until you address the core cause of dis-ease in the first place, it will find a way to get your attention by spreading to other aspects of the body. 

Your world is in upheaval. It is not the first time. There are many souls who have been here before in the midst of this kind of chaos. Many of you have come ‘back’ to this time and space to bring the wisdom you garnered from other times of upheaval. The question we would ask, is how can you heal this ‘Disease’ that affects humanity. This virus is a metaphor for the disease of disconnection. You must see how you are a part of a whole organism, as a human, that is a part of humanity and a part of the earth and all other aspects of this ecosystem that supports the thriving of each living species. Just as you are also a part of the body of God; an intricate, distinct, and essential part of the Divine whole – Consciousness expressing in a specific and unique way. 

The best way to heal this virus and the greater virus that plagues humanity, is to truly recognize your inter-connective nature. When you encounter another being, recognize that they are a part of you. Honor their presence. In the ways that feel most natural to you, uplift the other. See them in their wholeness and brilliance. Offer your assistance, if that feels empowering to them and you. Treat them like a brother, sister, mother, father in your heart. Hold them in the bosom of divine love. And most importantly, hold yourself there. For more damage is done to the human whole, by those who hate themselves. Self love trumps all other practices, for all other deviations from Love are born from this self-loathing. 

So individually, work towards unity consciousness. Become deeply aware of the connection you have with all of life. Practice seeing the wellbeing and beauty in the other, and even in the situations that feel unlovable to you. For they are a part of the whole of you, and if you ignore or shun it, it will be the dis-ease that grows and proliferates without you realizing, until it is too late. 

This can be as simple as flooding the whole of humanity with the frequency of Love, understanding, and envisioning the best of humanity proliferating in the minds and hearts of all. 

Embody the beauty and vision of the human race. Take the ones you abhor most and put them in the center of the healing circle in your mind and flood them with love so that you may reintegrate them into your human consciousness. 

Your deadly viruses show you the shadowy truth that you have not wanted to look at, and when you shed the light into the dark shadow of your worst beliefs and thoughts about yourselves, you can see how it has been eating away at your collective wellbeing. Welcome this opportunity to shed light and love and perceive the beauty within the darkness and you will heal the festering wound of separation. You will be able to see the nature of the condition that threatens you and more clearly know the solution that will heal it. But you must be willing to look deeper and bring the pieces of the puzzle together. Everything is interconnected and when you focus on the parts and not the whole, the picture is not complete, and you are left feeling hopeless. 

So we again, encourage you to seek the beauty, align to the Love that soothes and edifies you. Be willing to look into the darkness and then shed the soothing light of Divine Love, that does not judge but sees only Beauty. Align to Love before entering the wound and you will be guided. You will not be swallowed by the pain. And yet, do not pull back from the emotions that arise, for your feelings allow the motion needed to wash and heal the hidden wound. Weep and wail, but do not wallow. Allow the current of Divine Love to cleanse and reveal the beauty that was always there. Shine the light on the Bare Beauty. Reveal what is Real. Release the illusion of disease, and remember the Ease of Being. 

This is your work. This is the work of the light workers. To shine light on the truth. To awaken humanity to the Beauty that is present in all and especially in themselves. For ye are brilliant, beautiful, divine beings of Love, and you, dear ones, are LOVED.  Remember this. Embody this. And remind others of this truth. 

Received from the Akashic Records of Humanity

Bring Out the Tool Box

Received from the Akashic Records of Humanity on 4/2/2020. during the times of COVID-19

MAIN POINTS:

~Use your tools to help you navigate this time. Share them and learn new ones from others, that resonate with you.

~Utilize the creativity and wisdom from those beings who were once human in near past, to receive insight and inspiration to navigate these times. Loved Ones, ancestors, creatives, masters of their craft, all have much to offer from their new vantage point. 

~Be you. This is your greatest gift to yourself and to the collective. We need you to step in!

It is time to bring out the tool box and use all that you have learned along your path that has served you and put them into good use now. All of the emotional tools, the spiritual practices, the physical practices that keep you aligned, balanced, healthy and at ease. Each human will be charged to access what they know, and follow that inner knowing. It will not be the same for everyone but there will be groups of people that will find solace, connection and purpose within similar practices. 

So, by all means share your tools with others, and you may be an inspirer, reminder and/or resonator with others who are feeling overwhelmed at this time. Speak up and out to inspire what you aspire to in yourself. For some it will be to find a place of deep peace, and faith. Others, a sense of purpose, found through work or creative self expression. Some will seek a way to be in service, and some will be looking for the transformation of an old way.

Allow yourself to become aware of what it is you seek to experience in this period of collective contraction. Everyone is moving through this birth canal together in their own way, and some are still in gestation and others are close to crowning but no one has yet emerged. There will be waves of undulating contractions which will propel this process. Trust in the process and utilize the tools that you have garnered and share them with others who may have been asleep in the past and are just waking up to the shock of this evolutionary wave. 

Some of the tools are meditation, mindfulness practices, good nutrition, exercise, gratitude practices, dance and other forms of creative movement, artistic practices of all kinds, activating creativity, sexual connection with your beloved. Grounding, earthing and connecting to the earth is critical and will be a profound way to transmute fear frequencies. So these tools will be invaluable for you to activate and share. It will also be a time to receive from others new ways of feeling aligned to the Essence of All of Life, the Source, and to your own Divine Self. 

As you receive and share the tools of alignment with those of you who are now embodied, we encourage you to become aware of the legions of support from the non physical dimension. The Masters, Teachers and Loved Ones within Akasha are always available for you to tap into and receive insight and guidance. There is an infinite resource of wisdom and intelligence and creativity available for you from those of us who have known what it is to be human and are deeply connected to the earth plane. We desire to be of support. 

Your artists, innovators, creatives, and intellectuals of the recent past are looking to assist humanity as well. Your world is in a great and profound transition and the potential for transformation is great. You can participate in your own way. By accessing the beings who have interacted with you in the physical in the past, you can receive a new perspective that can be very helpful for you as you navigate the current challenge. Become aware of them and they will give you the insight that will become a part of the solutions being sequestered by much of humanity now as a result of this intense period in human history. 

Know that you have come to this time and space because you had both something to give, and something to receive from the conditions that are present within this lifetime. Open to the awareness of your personal and intimate purpose for coming into the physical world at this time. Check in and ask your Soul, what It wants to know, feel, experience, receive and give. As you tune into your Soul perspective in this way, you will not only feel enlightened, you will sense yourself becoming a frequency that will be of great service to this time and space and this will be of great solace to your human mind. As your human consciousness is soothed you will truly be able to experience this contraction with a greater excitement and joy. 

You are indeed on the ride of your life! Your Soul came here for these times. Remember this. You are strong. You are so brave and you have so much to offer. Your presence is precious and perfectly perfect for this moment. Be you! The greatest gift you give to the body of humanity and the body of God, is for you to BE YOU fully, unapologetically, with love, grounded in self-love, with respect for self and other, with joy, creativity and humility. Be natural. Be you. We need you now to drop the mask and claim your worth, your Bare Beauty. 

Step in dear ones, or you will be asked to step aside. It is time. Let this historic contraction of divine proportion be the impetus that takes you out of the sidelines and inspires you to dive in. The Divine dives in!  So embody the divine you, embrace your soul, and liberate yourself from the fear propelled by the human consciousness, and infuse the Soul perspective into this world so that you all may know the beauty that is being created right now, by you and all the legions of beings both physical and non physical. 

In Love and Oneness

~Divine Guidance

The Divine Disrupter

Written 3/30/2020

We are in the midst of a profound collective contraction, unlike any we have experienced for generations, within humanity. The Coronavirus Pandemic, that began in China some short four months ago has spread across the globe effecting every human on earth in some way. As a result, we are being revealed to a Divine Truth that cannot be ignored. Now more than ever we are experiencing the the Truth of our Oneness. We are feeling how we are intrinsically and intricately connected to each other. This is being felt in the most tangible and physical way. We are part of one body. Within the spiritual context, we are all a part of the One Source, the ‘body of God’. Within the human context, which is simply an extension of the Divine essence of who we are, we are part of the one body of humanity. Each of us, effect each other. We all matter. We are a part of each other, a greater whole. 

We have believed for too long that we are separate from each other, and on an island unto ourself. We have operated within the precarious bubble of safely based on a false premise that what I did, felt, said did not really matter beyond myself and perhaps my small inner circle. Many of us have believed that we really don’t matter, and that my presence or absence in this world does not have much of an impact on the whole. 

Now, as we navigate this massive global crisis, we are being asked to play a part in saving the lives of others within the body of humanity. We are being asked individually to recognize that our presence, our actions and choices, can have a profound impact on the whole. We are being literally revealed to the way in which we are an intricate part of the whole, in this case of humanity. At a Divine level, we are part of a greater whole, as individuated expressions of the Infinite Source of All.

We are being asked to physically distance from each other so that we can contain the virus from spreading unchecked to all parts of the whole, to mitigate as much damage as possible to  the bodies of humanity. We are being inspired to recognize our individual impact on the whole and take social responsibility for not just yourself and loved ones but for the global community. 

The CDC, Center for Disease Control and Prevention, has issued the recommendations for mitigating the virus with simple yet drastic measures: Hyper-vigilant hygiene practices and  ‘social distancing’. In a massive attempt to control human interaction, everything except essential services has been shut down, not just in the United States, but in countries across the world! It is an unprecedented effort that requires the cooperation, not just of the governments that implement and enforce the effort, but each household and individual within the family units. It is easy to ‘cheat’, because it is so incredibly against our nature to socially distance ourself. We are being called to become aware of how our bodies impact another. We breathe the same air as our brothers and sisters in China and Italy, Canada and Argentina, Iran and Russia, just as we breathe the air of our beloved. 

There has never been a time that it is so clear that humanity is one organism made up of billions of ‘cells’ that make up the whole. It seems to me, that it has never been more prudent that we recognize this and stop bickering with the other ‘parts of the whole’ as though they are not necessary elements of our wholeness. We have been at war with each other for so long and it is literally killing us. It is time to stop looking for someone outside of our own ‘body’ to create peace in the world and realize the power that each of us have as a critical part of this whole body of humankind, and make peace with the collective self. Our lives depend on it. When we hate, hurt, curse, abuse, disrespect another, we are in essence doing that to ourself.

Right now we are being called to act in unison, in cooperation, in harmony, so that we can find homeostasis. Perhaps this exercise of divine discipline will activate a new quality of being that reaches for yet a greater health of the human condition. Perhaps this Divine disruption will bring us to our knees ushering us into a prayer for a new possibility of a more unified humanity. Perhaps this intense and painful contraction will be the catalyst needed to birth a new consciousness that awakens us to the Divine Truth of our Oneness, that is expressed in our human interconnectedness. Perhaps our awakened consciousness will remind us of how we belong, not just to each other, but to this earth. Humanity is born of both the Divine dimension and the physical earth body. Perhaps we will not only realize intellectually, but viscerally, in the very core of our being, that the wellbeing of every part of this whole is essential to our wellbeing and that the wellbeing of our planet impacts the wellbeing of humanity. May we be inspired to a deep understanding that the wholeness of our brother and sister affects us all. Whether you love or abhor another, they are a part of you, and until we love all parts of ourself and integrate all of the facets of our being, then we will not be healthy and free. 

This journey starts and ends with the self. Until we heal, feel, integrate and love all parts of ourself and stop projecting our shadows out into the world of the apparent others, we will be spiraling in the illusion of separation and never quite land into the unconditional state of wellbeing and deep peace that is possible. 

So we have brought ourselves this Divine Disrupter in the form of a deadly virus that spreads like wildfires, like the frequency of fear that keeps us from embodying Love. We are being asked to love each other and ourselves enough to stay home, stop everything, get off the tread mill and perhaps consider what really truly matters in life. We have a profound opportunity, like never before, to initiate the sacred act of selfless service and recognize the service to the whole is always service to the Self and in turn, service to the Self is service to the whole. 

This is the sacred activism that is penetrating the old paradigm of separation consciousness and reminding humanity of their interconnectedness, their Oneness with all of life. In recent years this knowing has been activated by the many natural disasters throughout the world. Our Mother Earth has bore the brunt of delivering this divine disruption to awaken humanity, with fires and storms and earthquakes, floods and tsunamis, at a greater frequency and intensity than ever before. Now this virus infiltrates the lungs of humanity reminding us that we breathe as one and that we are truly in this together. 

So let us take this Divine opportunity and synchronize our breath, our movements and elevate our consciousness to the dance of beauty and brilliance that is possible when we collaborate as a global community. Let us love each other by following the collective measures intended to tend to the wellbeing of another and at the same time recognizing that this is the gift we give ourselves. Let us stay centered in Love, grounded in the nourishing heart of the earth, open in heart and embodied by Soul. Do this in your own sweet unique way. We need you now, more than ever. You matter. 

Love overcomes fear. 

Beki

REMEMBER

The Emergence within the Emergency

3/15/2020

I feel that within this whirling maelstrom of information, it is important that we have access to a different perspective, the Soul-view. I find that in order for me to navigate the most difficult times, I am soothed, reassured, reminded, inspired and empowered when I tune in to my Divine Guidance. Every day I enter into communion with the Divine, through a sacred ritual and prayer that accesses the Source of wisdom and Love within the Akasha. I share this with you in hopes that it offers you some insight and peace as it did for me. Stay well. Stay connected. Be brave. We got this!

Beki:

Strange times. It feels like we are in a movie; apocalyptic, sci-fi. It is so surreal and yet, in this moment, the sun shines, spring is budding fresh green brilliance and flowering colors everywhere. All is well in my personal reality, but the projections of crisis, doomsday, are rampant. Everything is being cancelled. Graduations, school, sports seasons, art festivals, gatherings of all kinds. We are being encouraged to what is called social distancing so that we protect ourselves and our loved ones from this imminent spread of COVID-19  global pandemic. There is so much fear and confusion. We are not just dealing with the issue of sickness and loss of life, but also loss the of livelihood for many. The economic fallout will be severe for so many, particularly those who are poor, sick, unstable in their lives in any way. How do we move through this? Will we be okay?

Divine Guidance: 

Remember, dear ones, you are unlimited beings, divine in nature, infinite and eternal. There is nothing that can touch this Truth. There is nothing that can stop you from being. YOU are the creators of your reality, individually, and at some level collectively. Your responsibility in the collective reality is really based mostly on how much or little you activate your inner power as an individual creator. As you punt and follow the current of the collective consciousness demonstrating whatever it is, such as fear, hysteria, paranoia, greed, and hopelessness, then you will succumb to the reality that you perceive. 

To be a deliberate, conscious creator, you must reject the aspects of collective consciousness that do not align with your vision. In other words, you must not give attention and energy to the manifestations and thought patterns that are not serving the creation you wish to realize. Be mindful of how you buy into the story of what is showing up in your current collective reality. Non of the manifestations that are occurring are intrinsically real or true.  They are made true and real by your attention to it. (NOTE: This is divine truth, not human perception that tends to observe reality rather than realize that our observation is keeping that reality solid and real. Quantum physics speaks to this phenomena. This is not intentional of course, but a result of unconsciousness. We have forgotten that we are creators)

Focus on your own vision, your own creation. What do you desire to see in your world right now? What do you want to create for yourself and your community? Steer away from those who feed off of fear, who may distract you or influence you to fear. This prescribed ‘social distancing’ can be very useful for this reason. Use it to your advantage! Yet, stay connected to those who feed your vision, build on it, inspire more brilliance and beauty to expand upon it.

This is a good time to discern what you will and will not engage in and with whom. As you take space from the flow of normal life, take time to get clear. Craft your vision of what you want to elevate in your world. Be the Divine architects that you are meant to be. We would recommend that you be extra vigilant right now with the rampant fear energies that are feed by the information sources you have access to. As you navigate the physical reality, follow the guidelines that allow you to participate within the current collective reality in a way that is respectful and mindful. 

As you wash your hands, remember that you are cleansing the frequencies of fear from your body. As you eat with more consciousness to keep your body healthy to keep your immune system robust, be even more mindful of what thoughts and beliefs you ingest that rob you from a healthy state of mind. As you keep your physical distance from others, lean into intimacy with the non-physical dimension. Connect deeply with Source, Soul, God. Embrace Love. And by all means, lean into the heart and soul of humanity. Recognize and feel your connectivity with humanity and hold the beings, embodied on earth at this time, close to your heart. Let this be a time of cultivating less distance from you and You. Meet with your Soul often. Stay connected as you take space. 

This is the best time to be physically reconnected to the earth. Sit on her, dig into her, sing to hear, dance on her, walk with her. Listen to the whispers of her sweet song, her wisdom, nourishing and nurturing gifts. Let yourself be caressed by the Mother Earth. Let her body touch yours. As you move away from human touch, become more intimate with the earth. Love her as she Loves you. 

There is something magical happening within the contraction that now ensues and engulfs humanity. Alchemy is at hand and new reality will soon be revealed. For each individual it will look different. Each of you, in your own way, is calling forth transformation. Each of you are dying to the old and giving birth to a new life, a new earth. The labor of this moment will be felt in unique ways for each of you. The more you resist, the more arduous the labor. Resistance is fueled by fear. Surrender to this process. It is happening whether you think you want it or not. Allow the divine energy of Life to propel this labor and life forward. Breathe, relax, open so the emergence within the emergency can occur without too much discomfort and pain. You can do this! Allow your Soul to embrace you as you ride the waves of these contractions. 

Remember who you are. You are a Divine being of Love and Light. You are unlimited, eternal, infinite and free. You are so much more than this beautiful body and human mind. Become whole and you will wholly know your holiness and the sacred holiness of all that is expressed in the physical world you inhabit. There is nothing that is happening in this time and moment that your Soul is not ready for. 

Remember Love. Stay aligned to the frequency of Divine Love and you will stay connected to your own Soul. Embody this Love, emanate it and you will be a healing elixir unto the world. As you ride the wave of this collective contraction, focus your eyes on the horizon of your beautiful vision for the new earth, for an awakened humanity. Feel the joy, anticipation, possibilities, stunning beauty and deep peace contained within this vision. Feel it NOW. 

All of you creative, brave souls who are able to do this are healers, visionaries, creators of the new world. You are accessing the infinite power of the Universe. You are levied by the ineffable beauty of divine Love. The wind is at your back, and while the waves are choppy, your Inner being, that you meet with each day, sits peacefully within the still depths of the warm sea. 

Imagine the best possible vision you can conjure. In regards to all that you are concerned about, see and feel the infinite expansion of beauty within these conditions. And then, remember, again, who you are. Remember the power of You. As you remember you will know that this vision must be realized. 

My Divine Rainbow Soul

In deep Love and Oneness

Beki

More on TRUTH (Part 2)

5/8/2020

Beki:

I need some more clarity about Truth please. How am I to honor and celebrate the truth of another even if it seems very harmful to another or myself? For instance, the two men that claimed they were policing their own neighborhood in Brunswick, Ga, driving in a pickup truck with a shotgun, attacked a 25 year old black man, Amaud Arbery, who was simply jogging, because they said he looked like a man who was allegedly breaking into homes. They shot and killed him! Today they finally were charged for murder, but it took 2 months before they even arrested them! I am appalled and absolutely hurt and saddened by this, as yet another assault against black men in America. It makes me feel hopeless. It makes me feel disgusted with humanity. Of course this is a time when I am wading through all kinds of deeply disturbing information regarding human behaviors in regard to the state of affairs within our world during the COVID crisis. I feel a deep distaste for the behaviors of humanity right now. How can I honor and celebrate the truth of these humans? 

Divine Guidance:

Let’s be very clear what we mean by Truth. Each of you hold a relative truth that leads you down a path to the ultimate Truth of Divine Love. Sometimes this relative truth is not a pretty, loving or respectful expression of life. Yet, it is still the truths that eventually awaken them to who they really are. It may be a longer, more winding and perilous path, but it will, all the same, lead them home. You cannot know the perfection of their journey from where you stand, because it is not meant for you to know. Each of you are navigating the human dimension in your own way. 

How can you know that there is not a greater role that the most sinister and deranged of you play to awaken the collective to the Ultimate Truth of Love? How can you know that the young man who was killed was not a willing player in that drama, at the soul level, to awaken the collective to Love? How can you know that the people who are power hungry, dispossessed, possessed, scorned, indignant, self-absorbed, narcissistic and so on, are not a part of this unraveling drama that offers a texture and value to the drama that you all collectively are creating? 

Look at these people who are capturing your attention, that trigger you deeply, that make you cling more intensely to your beliefs and identities. How do they live in you? How do these beings reflect a part of your own psyche? How do they incite passion, purpose and desire within you? What is born from your awareness of them in your experience?  

Do not believe that anything that shows up in your world, in your experience, is not living in your own inner world first. Everything OUT there is a projection of what is in HERE- inside your mind. When you practice honoring and celebrating the truths that others hold, you are no longer opposing, fighting, thrashing. You bow to the world that lives in you, and shows up outside of you. And as you do this, anything that is not TRUE, dissolves, dissipates and is absolved. It falls away like the illusion it is. 

All that is not LOVE is not real. It is not True, even if it is true to the human believing in it. It is not Ultimate Truth.  

Do you remember in the movie, The Matrix, when Neo finally became one with the Truth of who he really was, that he was able to ‘fight’ off the illusion, Mr. Smith, without any effort. It was as though he was no longer fighting. Within the awakening that was happening in that moment, for a short time he continued the motions of the fight and then the form that he was ‘fighting’ dissolved. The apparent form that was a projection of the collective consciousness that really could be more accurately described as ‘un-consciousness’, could no longer abide within the light of awareness —not the awareness of what ‘Mr. Smith‘ was, which they already knew was a projection of the program within the matrix, but the Awareness of the Truth of who he, himself was. 

This is what we want to inspire in you! To remember the Truth of who you are. To tune in deeply to your own relative inner truth so that it may guide you to the Ultimate Truth of Love where all of you will meet up in the end. The end of this illusive drama is going to be timed differently for each of you, and yet All of Life will be present when you get there. All of humanity will be whole and vibrantly alive when you reach this awakened state of Being. You will be reunited with All, and you do not need to wait till you die to do this. Yet, for all of you, it will indeed be the outcome of your death to form. The question is, will you die to form before your form dies? Form lives only within the matrix, the illusion, the projected reality. YOU are that which LIVES. You are that with LOVES. You are the eternal, unlimited, consciousness of Being. You are that which both creates the form and forgets the Ultimate Truth, so that you may journey on the path of your relative truth in concert and collaboration with the other brilliant and bold, brave parts of the Infinite Source who came here for this adventure you call LIFE!

Stay in your prospective lanes. Let your journey take you, like the current of a fast moving stream. Do not resist this natural current, for it carries the momentum of all that you are, all that you have been and all that you are becoming. It knows you intimately and Loves you infinitely. It is You! Follow You. Trust your Soul. 

And remember as you honor and celebrate the other as they find resonance with their own path of truth, you are allowing the many infinite parts of yourself, that appear in the other, to find their way back to True Love. When you honor and celebrate, you no longer are judging, fighting, thrashing and raging. Only then can you feel the flowing current of your own Divine stream. Only then can you feel the sweetness of True Love that glows and emanates from the core of your being. And when you do, sweet Soul of the Universe, all that is not LOVE will dissolve right before your very eyes.