What are you VOTING for?

As this general election comes to a climax, there is one thing that continues to reverberate in my mind and heart.

What we embody, we emanate. What we emanate we create. Our inner world is reflected in our outer world. What, therefore, are you embodying? What result do we want to see from this election? Regardless of the candidates you are voting for, WHAT are you voting for? What quality of life are you desiring? As we perceive a country divided, how can we embody the possibility of unity?

I imagine that the essence of what I desire as a human being is not so different from all other humans: Health, Love, to feel safe, prosperous, inspired. I desire peace of mind and peace in the world around me. I desire my children to be happy, healthy and self-sufficient. I desire a healthy environment; clean air, water, soil, food. I want enough for myself and others. I want to be treated with respect and dignity, the freedom to choose the lifestyle I desire. I could go on and on, and my hunch is that every human’s core desire is not so different. We just all have different ideas on how to achieve this.

We have become defensive and fearful, and combative. Yet, it is the simple yet powerful act of embodiment that will not only create a healthier, more beautiful inner world for ourselves to enjoy, but it becomes the epicenter of a seismic wave of energy that ripples into the world around us. This energy informs the climate of emotion that informs the climate of mind that impacts the actions taken within the collective field. It is time for a climate change. And it begins with our intention to literally be the change we wish to see in the world.

I know this sounds ridiculously simple, even though this statement made by Gandhi has been quoted a million times. But I sense that it is the key to the secret garden of Eden to which we all yearn to return. Most of us miss the point of BEING, and we jump into action before we have fully basked in the state of being that we wish to feel and see expressed in the world. Peace; this is a big one. If I cannot know, feel and maintain a state of inner peace, then I cannot be an agent for peace in the outer world. Love: I yearn to live in a world that people show love and respect and honor for each other, and yet if I have not cultivated a consistent state of love for self and others within my immediate world, how can I expect to see it out there.

Perhaps we believe if these states of Being were expressed in the world around us that we could finally be able to feel the love, peace, safety, enoughness that we seek to know. We have created a paradigm in which we rely on the outside to change the inside. It is a fatally disempowering paradigm. We believe that if we elect the right people who think as close to the way we think about the issues that are dear to us that at last, we can be safe, free, supported.

As long as we look outside ourselves to be ‘saved,’ we will live in a divided country, a divided self. Yet, as I embody my soul and the qualities that align me to my divine self, I know, experience and feel the fullness of life’s abundant beauty and the possibilities for us all. So, I commit to hold this state of embodied love and peace with faith and trust, not in a perfect government, but in an awakening of humanity to the peace and beauty that lives within each of us. Through the eyes of possibility and creativity, I will see a new Earth, a new humanity that deeply loves and respects itself.

While I have already cast my vote in the general election, I will continue to focus each day on that which I am voting for, not what I am voting against. I have had a lifetime to get clear about what I don’t want for myself and my community. I have been derailed, disheartened, and disenfranchised as I have bared witness to the conditions that I deem unacceptable. And in my powerlessness, I gave birth to my desire to be an agent of change. For me, I keep being guided back to the simple truth that begins with the profound intention to embody that which I desire to see and experience in my world. It takes discipline, awareness, and profound self-love.

So as you cast your vote, remember the power of your inner state to affect the outer state of the country and the world. My son said to me the other day, “I don’t feel that my one vote will make a difference.” I think he speaks for many. Yet, I know that every single person on this planet matters, and so does our vote — our literal vote and, more importantly, our energetic vote for what we bring to life. What are you voting for? What you embody, you vote for, and you send out into the matrix of life and we are all touched by these energetic votes in ways beyond what we can imagine. Your vote matters, and it creates matter, so let’s get intentional and embody what matters to you.

I vote for love, peace, joy, freedom, vitality, health, wisdom, compassion, inspiration, kindness, creativity, innovation, beauty, unity consciousness, appreciation, acceptance, opportunity for all, enthusiasm, understanding, patience, healing, transformation, Oneness, Awakening…

What are you VOTING for?

The World and The Inner-Net

Sept. 2020

Do you remember the good ole days, when all we knew about was the small world we lived in. Our immediate world was our world. We had three TV channels with news twice a day for an hour, thirty minutes each for local and world, as I recall. Of course I was a child during this golden age of ignorance, for the most part, which made it even easier to maintain relatively untouched by drama beyond my own. I was born in 1966. There seemed to be as much good news as bad news back then, seen through this limited window of what was happening in our community and the world around us. 

Now of course we are inundated 24/7 with bad news —devastating, heartbreaking, inconceivable, horrifying and terrifying news. Not just is it on television all day and night with hundreds of pundits elucidating us with their barrage of opinions, it is being broadcast in ads and opinions from your own friends and social media community weighing in on our handheld appendage, we call a cell phone. We all know it is hardly just a phone anymore. It is our world. In the palm of our hand. And, everybody else’s world. 

Some of this world is spectacular. It is a window into the brilliance, beauty, creativity, innovation  expressed in the world and humankind. It is mind boggling, the infinite field of information on the internet. Just as when Eve shared the luscious, red, crispy, sweet, juicy apple with Adam, opening their world up beyond the small yet magically perfect garden of Eden, we all eagerly bit the apple of the internet. Our world blew open and we would never be able to go back to the Eden of ignorance. Yes, ignorance, indeed, is bliss.

Yes, we opened up to a world beyond our little worlds and we are all sitting wondering if it has enriched our lives more than it was before, with all this extra information. As we wade through the the catastrophes, calamities, and cacophony as well as the stunning art, flyest fashion, and the latest Tupperware we are being stretched. So much so, we have become numb, medicated, chronically ill, or combustible. Or, perhaps you have found a path to inner alignment. Perhaps you have found yourself, like I, on your path to Awakening. 

I think of Awakening as the realization of your True Self, your Inner Being, your infinite, unlimited, eternal nature. It can be a visceral awareness, a deep ineffable remembering, a flash that feels eternal, or eternity that feels fleeting. It is awakening to the vast infinite field of the inner net that is so deep, wide and vast that it encompasses not just this universe, but ALL universes and beyond. This Divine Self is the inner-net that is truly infinite. When we awaken, we remember this truth and the drama of the form within the in-form-ation that we derive from the internet, is an expression, an outer tendril of this infinitesimal Universe that we are ONE with. 

We have gotten so utterly lost in the form in this information that we have forgotten that we are the IN that is creating the form!  When we go IN we access this creative force that fuels the expressions that unfolds in form. The IN is infinite. It is the non-stuff we are made of! 

We are letting information become more important than those creating it in the first place. Yes, information is created like everything else, save the Source that created it All. 

So what do we do with this contemplation I am sharing now, so it does not become another pile of information absorbed in the internet of things and thoughts. 

I offer it to you to initiate, activate, awaken the part of you that is ready to remember. There is something beyond the landfills of form, lives lived well, and maybe not so well, and all the things that were created on that journey, tangible and intangible, yet form all the same. I invite you to join me as I venture beyond what is and step into the dark cool waters of the unknown that lead us to the sweet sounds of our Souls serenading us into Life and Love that is formless, so that we may infuse our brilliant, creative, distinct essence into a new creation. Let’s leave the known land of massive archives held within the internet and venture into the inner-net that weaves a golden thread of connection with all life living deep within and beyond form. Let’s consider the possibilities we may inspire to emerge from the Infinite Field of formless Love. The womb of creation awaits your entry and lavishly nourishes you as you gestate in her dark fertile soil, so you may bring from your inner-net what you would be proud to see archived on the internet one day. 

The time of ignorance and knowledge has passed and we move into the time of wisdom and remembrance. We have devoured the red fruit of knowledge leaving our innocence behind with our ignorance and now we emerge with experience. With this evolved wisdom garnered through eons of trial and error, we embrace a new innocence, entering the threshold of a new way born of our deepest, sweetest desires. We surrender control and allow the emergence of Love beyond our individual and separate minds, thoughts, beliefs and truths. We trust in something grander, more beautiful, expansive and inclusive to embrace us and guide us to this new garden of Eden that we sense is just over the horizon.

I am here as guide for this inner-net. Although I do not see the way, I have honed my homing device that senses the way, by listening to my inner voice that keeps patiently calling me home. 

Wading into the cool, dark water can be scary at first, but once you begin you may realize that it is the easiest most natural path to take.  While your path may look different from mine, when in the depths of the Divine womb, our paths intersect in this web of intricate perfection and I can feel the vibration of you resonating as you find your way. There are guides, physical and non-physical, for us all, plucking the cords of our strings singing us home to the land where we live in coherence and harmony. 

My Theory of Emergence

The Vortex. Oil on canvas. By beki

8.25.2020

I propose, from my own spiritual, creative, artistic point of view, my own theory of emergence. I have been contemplating this as I explore the germ theory versus terrain theory as we are in the throes of a global health crisis, the COVID-19 Pandemic, that hinges its existence and perpetuation on the stronghold of this idea of germ theory. It presumes that a germ, a pathogen, a virus, that lives outside us, can jump on us, projected from another person infected with this disease, and cause disease within us. 

This model of reality is entrenched not just in our story of biology, but our social structures and traditional western religious models that assume that we are victim to something outside of us that determines our fate. In my own journey of awakening, I have come to a deep knowing that the Source, we call God, is not a force outside of me, but a Divine essence that resides within me and within all of Life. This Essence is Love and permeates and animates all of life. I also have a felt knowing that we are all sovereign beings of divine proportion, creators with profound and unlimited power that we have become utterly and tragically unaware of. So much so, that we succumb to the belief that we can be crushed and obliterated by an inert virus that succumbs to 20 seconds of hand washing. We believe that if we can just keep it out of our bodies, we will be safe.

In spite of this truth that the Universe resides within us all with divine intelligence and benevolence, the story of separation that fuels the beliefs that we are alone, weak, vulnerable, sinners, and so on, has infiltrated our minds and highjacked our reality. These self-deprecating legacies, entrenched in the lore of humanity, have inspired a perception of reality that tells the terrifying stories of contagion that gave me nightmares my whole life. 

Now I sit in the midst of this nightmare, and I am forced to wake up or else I will drown in my own fear. 

My theory of emergence, reflected beautifully within the ‘New Biology’ that I have recently become very intrigued with, is that everything emerges from you: your body, your mind, your consciousness. As I was doing my morning mediation I thought about how love is something that we seek outside of ourselves all the time. We ache to be loved. But could it be that we ache to feel love or loved. Certainly outside conditions can inspire the environment for the feeling to arise within us, but love cannot be injected into us. Someone can be effusively loving us and unless we can feel it within us, the gesture of devotion can have no effect. Therefore it seems to me that Love lives within and when felt it emerges impacting all who are present to experience the emergence and expression of what was there all along. 

The terrain theory in biology postulates that it is the inner environment of the body that is most consequential when it comes to the ability for conditions of disease to manifest within the body. In a way the disease emerges from the body as a way to alert the person that there is imbalance within. I feel that this imbalance begins with the mind, the thoughts and beliefs, and slowly makes its way into the physical body as a form of inner communication. In this sense disease is not so much a negative event, but rather a  network of communication designed to wake us up to something either spiritually, psychologically, or environmentally that is out of balance. Disease is a mechanism to inspire awareness for rebalancing, homeostasis.  

I also believe that there are conditions expresses in one’s life and body that are inspired by a more mysterious source that allows the soul to experience the adventure it came forth to live. In this case, while the disease could be a way of indicating imbalance, it also could be called forth by the soul of the human for a profound and deeply desired experience that our human minds cannot make sense of. Some things we just simply cannot understand from the human perspective and certainly not from the logical mind divorced from the mystical heart of intuitive knowing. 

Yet, this terrain theory of what I would like to call emergence, feels kinder to me than the older theory of the germ. It offers an empowering story in which we are never victims of life. Rather, we are continuously being offered feedback from the universe of what we are holding within our mind and body that no longer serves us. Just like the belief system that embraces the law of attraction, and that we ‘create our own reality’, I recognize that both by intention and by default, I am participating in my life’s expressions. I choose consciously or unconsciously by my focus and my perception. 

When life feels completely out of my control, I have learned to surrender to my Higher Power that not only lives within all living beings, but lives within me. This act of surrender, in a way, is a declaration of my faith in my Divine Self and the Infinite Source that I am one with. This faith is emergent. It is not something that can be learned. It can be cultivated, but the seed of faith lives within each of us. 

I have come to understand the collective reality, not as something imposed on me, but as an opportunity to see how I am either in coherence or dissonance with that reality. I can then choose consciously how I will participate in the emergence of a desired expression of collective reality. As a Divine Being, I recognize that my expressed energy has an impact on the whole. 

What we embody we emanate. 

When I am intentional and conscious of what I am embodying, I am choosing to be a vector of Love, peace, wisdom, kindness, respect, reverence, patience, understanding. It is my desire to embody that which I yearn to experience reflected back to me from the world. This quality of being that naturally and effortlessly emerges from me, is always what is being reflected back to me. The feedback gives me clarity as to what I am embodying. 

When I am looking outside myself and striving to change the conditions/symptoms, that are really the feedback offered for self awareness and self-reflection, I will often feel the mounting fear and exasperation, victimhood and hopelessness that is the very thing aching within me and causing me to flail in the world of form to create change. 

While some things will seemingly be accomplished from this old way of creating change, the more effective approach to bringing balance and homeostasis to a diseased, chaotic world, is from the inside out. Heal the dis-ease within and embody the essence of what you desire to see reflected in your world and you will become a powerful force for change. The work to heal anything, indeed, comes from within each of us. It is profound, conscious work and often considered self-indulgent. Yet, as we enter into a broader and deeper understanding of life, where the spiritual, social, biological intersect, where all is interconnected, you will recognize the beauty of self-full consciousness as a potent elixir for collective transformation. 

So dear citizens of planet earth, consider this possibility. If you are in the throes of the coronavirus experience or any other threatening reality, take the time to go within and explore what in you is a reflection of the world outside of you. Each of us are experiencing this global condition in different ways. Each of us are triggered by different aspects of this drama. As you see your part in this collective expression, consider what you would like to change about your offering. What is it that you need to embody in you, that you would like to see expressed in the world you live in. As you become clear, you are able to stop projecting all that you fear or despise outside of you and allow yourself to feel how it lives inside of you. 

This courageous act of self awareness is a profound gift to yourself and the whole of Life. As you own this dis-ease, you heal it. For as long as it is outside of you, you will be helpless to heal it. You can only heal what is yours to heal. This self-love heals you. As you heal, you become an unhindered vector of Love that has more influence and impact on the world than any diseased part of yourself ever had. Your inner terrain becomes a field of Love and light and all that comes into your sphere ‘catch’ the virus of love and this is the energy that becomes  contagious. Love will spread like wild fire to all the expressions of life around you and then the rippling effect will be exponential. 

You will be a vision of glowing health that will light up the world with your inner flame so others become more awake and aware of their own Inner Light. So take the time to tend you your inner terrain. It matters. For it is the very space from which all matter emerges.